Survivor Fiji and Yau-Man
For the most part, I really don’t like reality shows. Anyone who knows me knows this to be the case. The one exception was Combat Missions, a reality show that pitted various special forces and S.W.A.T. teams against each other. But in the end, I really didn’t care for some of the things that went on there. I was actually ashamed of the behavior of some of the SEALs, whom I found to be whiny and bitchy. Just not consistent behavior for most of the SEALs I’ve known.
Anyway, this particular season of Survivor had a contestant by the name of Yau-Man Chan. This mid-50s engineer was quite the surprising competitor. I really figured he’d excel on a number of the puzzle challenges. But on the physical ones? No way. Well, he proved me wrong. I especially liked this one challenge where they had to use a bow and arrow. Some of the other contestants were laughing and dismissing him, which I found quite rude. And another contestant was found bragging about how good he was with the bow. LOL! He looked like an idiot when he shot the ground. Yau-Man, on the other hand, tore it up. He did great. This seemed to be typical for him on other challenges as well.
But none of this is my reason for posting. I was very impressed by this man’s character and wisdom on this show. He had made a pact with one of the other contestants and sealed it with giving the other guy a brand new Ford F350 pickup. All this other guy had to do was give up the immunity idol if he won it once they got down to the final 4 contestants. Sure, it’s a lot to ask for. But then again, it was a big “what-if” that this other contestant would even be in such a position. After all, Yau-Man was no slouch and he had just won this incredible truck. Well, suffice it to say, the guy won the challenge as Yau-Man had hoped. But what did the other guy do? He kept the idol. This wouldn’t be good TV if he had kept his word.
Where am I going with all of this? Despite all of the contempt for this one individual, and the urgings to sue or to take back the truck, Yau-Man reminded the guy that it was a gift and that he should enjoy it. Regardless of everything else said and done since then, that moved and impressed me. What a remarkable demonstration of forgiveness and grace– two things this world can stand to see more of.
In the last couple of days, I’ve had the privilege of exchanging some emails with Yau-Man. He shared with me how he felt about the whole thing and what his motivation was during the show and especially in light of this betrayal. I won’t post his response without his approval, but suffice it to say he impressed me further.
I’m not too old, I don’t think. I’m 39 and will be 40 in September. But I’ve been around enough to realize that while Yau-Man may have lost the $1M award, he has earned the admiration of respect of millions, which is worth much, much more. And I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up earning a lot more than what many feel he was entitled to. I wish all the best for him. And for the contestant who showed zero courage, integrity or maturity, I hope he can find the grace and self-forgiveness to live with himself. I don’t think he understood the full significance of his compromise. If he did, he would have handed the idol over to Yau-Man immediately upon receiving it.
Not my usual style of post, I know. But then again, there’s little that really impresses me these days. An exception was certainly called for.
As a survivor fan, I have to say that Yau-Man was a great person to have on the show. I was more than frustrated when he got screwed on the truck deal, but he handled it just like it should have been handled. I don’t look for role models on television, but we could all learn a great deal from him.
You’re such a liar….you KNOW you love ANTM!
I”m still stunned that he lost. BUT at least he left the game w/ his integrity, which is a lot more than most of the other contestants can say.
Awesome post! How in the world did you contact Yau-Man? I don’t watch the show myself, for reasons like the betrayal. But it’s inspiring to hear about acts of decency and honor in the world. Sometimes you forget. The world is a scary place and too many of the people in it are dishonest.
Btw, it doesn’t surprise me that you’re drawn to people like Yau-Man. He’s a lot like you.
Thomas: I appreciate your comment. Frankly, I saw it going down the way it did. And I’m sure he knew the gamble. The sad part is that Dreamz lived up to others’ expectations of himself. I think Yau-Man simply gave the guy one more opportunity. He made an investment in Dreamz.
EE: Dear! You are absolutely right and I’m glad you called me out. Because I absolutely LOVE America’s Next Top Model. I especially like Ms. J.
Tink: You’re gonna make me blush. I may be generous. I’m pretty certain that I’ve demonstrated it over the years. However, I don’t think I’d have controlled myself the way Yau-Man did. I would have seriously contemplated putting a hurting on the guy. I may have refrained in the end. But I would have certainly entertained the thought.